How to exit vim

Below are some simple methods for exiting vim.

The simple way

Credit: @tomnomnom

:!ps axuw | grep vim | grep -v grep | awk '{print $2}' | xargs kill -9

The ps-less way

Credit: @tomnomnom

:!kill -9 $(find /proc -name "cmdline" 2>/dev/null | while read procfile; do if grep -Pa '^vim\x00' "$procfile" &>/dev/null; then echo $procfile; fi; done | awk -F'/' '{print $3}' | sort -u)

The ps-less way using status files

Credit: @hakluke

:!find /proc -name status | while read file; do echo "$file: "; cat $file | grep vim; done | grep -B1 vim | grep -v Name | while read line; do sed 's/^\/proc\///g' | sed 's/\/.*//g'; done | xargs kill -9

The pythonic way

Credit: @hakluke

:py3 import os,signal;from subprocess import check_output;os.kill(int(check_output(["pidof","vim"]).decode
('utf-8')),signal.SIGTERM)

The remote way

Credit: @eur0pa

In vi:

:%!( key="kill-vi-$RANDOM"; nc -l 8888 | if grep $key; then pgrep '^vi$' | xargs kill; fi; ) &

Remotely:

$ while true; do curl http://vi-host:8888/kill-vi-$RANDOM; done

vi will eventually exit

Locally (the cheaty, lazy way, why even bother):

$ curl "http://localhost:8888/$(ps aux | grep -E -o 'kill-vi-[0-9]+')"

The hardware way

Credit: @Jorengarenar

Pull the plug out

The timeout way

Credit: @aarongorka

Before running vim, make sure to set a timeout:

$ timeout 600 vim

Never forget to set a timeout again:

$ alias vim='timeout 600 vim'

Make sure to save regularly.

The Russian Roulette timeout way

When you want to spice things up a bit:

$ timeout $RANDOM vim

The physics way

Credit: @eyemyth

Accumulate a sufficient amount of entropy.

The reboot way

Credit: @tctovsli In vi:

:!sudo reboot

The using vim against itself way (executing the buffer)

Open Vim to empty buffer and type:

i:qa!<esc>Y:@"<cr>

The AppleScript way

Credit: @dbalatero In Mac terminal vi:

Replace "iTerm" with your terminal application of choice:

:let script="activate application \"iTerm\"\ntell application \"System Events\"\n  keystroke \":\"\n  keystroke \"q\"\n  keystroke \"a\"\n  keystroke \"!\"\n  key code 36\nend tell" | call writefile(split(script, "\n", 1), '/tmp/exit-vim.scpt', 'b') | !osascript /tmp/exit-vim.scpt

The Mac Activity Monitor way

Credit: @dbalatero

let script="activate application \"Activity Monitor\"\ntell application \"System Events\"\n\tkeystroke \"f\" using {option down, command down}\n\tkeystroke \"vim\"\n\n\ttell process \"Activity Monitor\"\n\t\ttell outline 1 of scroll area 1 of window 1\n\t\t\tselect row 1\n\n\t\t\tkeystroke \"q\" using {option down, command down}\n\t\t\tkey code 36\n\t\tend tell\n\tend tell\nend tell\n" | call writefile(split(script, "\n", 1), '/tmp/exit-vim.scpt', 'b') | !osascript /tmp/exit-vim.scpt